Status discrimination, for one, means that victims of domestic violence are sometimes stereotyped as being of a certain class, or from a certain income or education level. That old “That sort of thing can’t happen here, to people like us,” excuse is a person’s way of thinking they’re protected from domestic violence when in fact abusers come from all walks of life, all income levels, all geographical areas, all types of professions, and all sorts of family backgrounds.
The work victim itself can trap someone in a role of being passive, helpless or weak. Many people, understandably, don’t want to label themselves as victims or be called victims. This is how the term “survivor” came to be the preferred nomenclature to describe someone who has endured abuse.
And then there is that belief by some, carried over from decades past, that domestic violence is a domestic issue, one that should be handled by a couple, privately in their home. This idea lays some of the blame for domestic violence on the survivor, as though he or she has somehow played a part in the abuse occurring. Even the police are sometimes guilty of believing this outdated idea.
Between these stigmas and the widespread victim-shaming that occurs on the regular basis, it’s no wonder survivors have a hard time stepping forward and speaking out when they experience abuse.
That’s why it’s up to those outside the cycle of abuse-the support persons, the advocates, the concerned friend and family members-to validate and believe survivors when we hear about abuse. When someone comes forward with a confession of abuse, or even lightly dances around the topic, perhaps afraid to fully admit what’s happening, but still scared enough that it needs to be hinted at, it’s vital to listen, you can be that person’s only trusted lifeline. (Domesticshelters. org.)
For more information on how to validate someone in an abusive relationship and not re-victimize that person, call Project Celebration, Inc.
Many, LA. 318-2566242 Mansfield, La. And Red River, La. 318-349-8938 Natchitoches, La. 318-663-5961 Shreveport, La. 318-221-8003 Someone will answer 24/7, 365 days a year. Let us help!! You are not alone!!